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February 01, 2009

Comments

Bunny

Will the bigot who wrote the comment about black and Jews and the therepist, please come forward with your real name, instead of using someone else's !!!!!

How cowardly is that?

Dolores

John,

The first part of the bill is a pre-marital education program, it is not mandated if you choose to go you will get a discount on your marrigae license. It is just like pre-cana. I have done alot of research on this bill which 28 states have already implemented. Studies have shown that the divorce rate has decreased in these states.
The second part of the bill is a class that couples would go to before they can be granted a divorce. If you could spend $250 dollars to try and work out your marriage or if you still decide to follow through with a divorce wouldnt it be worth it instead of spending thousands of dollars on attorney fees. If you have Children it would help you make the trasition for them easier. Who get hurt the most during a divorce, the children. It is just a bill to give people the same pre-marital counseling that the Catholic Church offers. I have spoken to Clergy members about pre-cana couples that have gone through it decided marriage wasn't for them. Isn't it better to find out before then to go through with getting married and then 6 months or a few years down the road you are spending all of this money to get divorced. This bill can only help people we are not here to hurt people. As for Ronnie there are people that just want to bad mouth her. I think Diane is a made up person by someone else that wrote about Ronnie. Have any other questions please feel free to email me.
Dolores

John

Delores, since you're involved, could you set aside whether Ronnie is or isn't a good therapist or person and talk a little about the meat of the bill?

With the phrase "gender differences" so prominent, I find it more than a little bit disturbing. I'd really rather not fill the heads of a generation of newlyweds with a bunch of sexual politics about how "women speak in code" or "men aren't in touch with their feelings." Actually, I'm not so much "disturbed" as "offended."

Is this really what the bill is about, or was that just an unfortunately chosen example?

Dolores

Since a few people are trying to make this about the Life of Ronnie, I am the person working on this bill with her. We are not making a dime off of this. It has cost us money to to take the time to do the research
about this bill.
As for Ronnie I could tell you she is one of the few therapists that is not in it for the money. I have Cancer, let me ask you if there is any other therapist that would have taken the time out her weekends to call me. Ronnie has been there for me everday since I was diagnosed with Cancer. There has not been one day that she has not called to make sure I am ok.
As for billing the insurance companies, no matter how much you bill the insurance company they send what they want. Check your insurance statements from doctors, do they get the amount they bill for? As for Mary Mucci, she only tries to report on things that are helpful to people, it took me a long time to get her interested in this bill. Instead of focusing on Ronnie and Mary, why don't you focus on trying to make something better for people. Maybe there wouldn't be so many single parents if there was help for them, like 28 other states offer. As for the few of you that want to critize Ronnie's life, think about your own life. Ronnie is a human being like everyone else with feelings. For your information Ronnie does have a waiting list for people to get appointments with her. I guess that is because of the therapist she is. I am sorry for the few people that do have a problem with her. Ronnie is too professional to break down and cry in front of any one. It's really sad to know there are people out there that care about childern and families and then you get a few who are so fast to critize the help they are trying to offer. As hard as it might be to believe there are people that do care and are not in it for the money.
Two of those people are Ronnie and me. As for all of you thinking I am a friend of Ronnie's I am not, I a client and just a person that volunteers her time to help children and familes. Having cancer puts a perspective on life, it makes you realize what is important. If you have any questions about this email me at [email protected] I will be glad to send you any information about how this bill has helped decrease the divorce rate in other states.

Laura S. from Jericho

"...Ronnie, like all of us, is only human. Put anyone under a microscope and you will find a flaw..."


Sounds to me like a social worker who is basically saying: "Do as I suggest, not as I do."

No thanks...I'll pass.

"... Any social worker can tell you that they are not in it for the money. Unfortunately, our society does not sufficiently monetarily reward the people that choose this noble occupation..."

That's a little hard to believe when they are billing the insurance companies to the tune of $200 to $300 dollars an hour.

I'd like to watch her tell the single mother in Wyandanch how difficult it is to live on $300 an hour.

Friend

It would appear that the vast majority of the comments are regarding the messenger instead of the message. News 12 did not do a segment on the life and times of Ronnie Sonnenberg. Our local news network aired a show about the idea of a Marriage Preservation Act. Therefore, I’ll only briefly comment on Ms. Sonnenberg, whom I’ve known for over 20 years. Ronnie, like all of us, is only human. Put anyone under a microscope and you will find a flaw. What is remarkable about her though is that she has chosen to devote her life to a profession of helping others with her special interest being in teaching people to have happier, healthier relationships. Any social worker can tell you that they are not in it for the money. Unfortunately, our society does not sufficiently monetarily reward the people that choose this noble occupation. The point is that she is not advocating for the preservation of marriages to make a buck. Ronnie is genuinely passionate about lowering the appalling divorce rate and increasing the marriage rate by teaching individuals to have a greater understanding of themselves and their partners. This is what drives the messenger.

Now, on to what the blog should really be focusing on, the message. The Marriage Preservation Act would present an incentive to couples to take a marriage education class by reducing or possibly waiving their marriage license fee. It’s not about mandating that people take Ronnie’s course. In fact, the class would be optional and many of them are taught by para professionals, teachers, lay leaders, mentor couples, and clergy. The legislation is about motivating people to get interpersonal relationship skills that will not only help their marriage but that they can generalize to their other relationships as well. It’s about trying to enhance the physical, emotional and economic health and well being of the men, women, and children in our community. That is the message. That is where the focus needs to be if we are to embrace this problem and have a positive impact.

Dee

First of all before this show was aired there was alot of research done about how this bill has helped decrease the divorce rate in other states. If any of you would like the information go to www.smartmarriages.com
Some of these other people that are trying to bad mouth what Ronnie is trying to accomplish maybe you should know the facts before you talk about her marriage. For the two of you who say she is such a bad therapist, did someone put you up to saying things about her. Ronnie is not a friend of Ms. Mucci. As for Caroline's comment the $40 fee has nothing to do with the $250 fee for a marriage class. And it is not her course the course would be given by many different people ex: clergy, therapists If you attend a pre-marital education class your marriage license fee is reduced. And to the former client the information was checked out. If you could take a course such as pre-cana to help you understand marrige better, what is the problem? Wouldn't you want to have a better marriage. When the economy is bad, divorce rates rise check out an article in the NY Times as Economy Sours, Divorce Rates Rise. People tend to go for therapy in bad times.

Caroline O'Hurley

I noticed that the latest advertisement that Mary is now blogging about is for Ronnie Sonnenberg and her services. By taking her "course" in gender differences one can hopefully (if her proposal ever passes) save the $40 fee for a NYS marriage license.

One problem though - to save the $40 fee you need to pay $250 for her course.

diane

That lady is crazy and nearly ruinad my marriage. next time do better backround checks on your subjects she fools people its called narsicistic.
Former client

gail picciano

YOU have got to be kidding me maital advice from a lady who's own is falling apart!I was once her client untill the day ms.sonnenberg broke down in tears over her failed marriage yes thats right in the middle of my session and she even had gall charge my insurance co. for the session. Needless to say I found anew therapist thank God their not all bad and I'm glad to say that my marriage is great if I listend to Ronnie I would've been divorced.

John

Huh? "Gender differences"?

Look, I'm all for trying to convince people that commitments shouldn't be thrown out just because there's stress in the relationship. I really do think married people should try to make things work, rather than bailing just for lack of a better plan, since they obviously got married for a reason.

However, this modern "women from Venus" garbage has got to go. Your relationship won't be any better for "knowing" that the menfolk need their status symbols and women need to be hugged any more than it'll help you at work to "know" that black people like fried chicken and Jews like money.

Yeah, I went there. Because the concept is just as offensive, especially in the name of harmony.

As for Carol, what relevance would the Florida marriage license fee have to a New York bill? Perhaps you also think that Mary should list the current electrical rates in Mexico City?

Carol Noran

Come on, Are you serious? Let's not start blaming EVERY illness on marital discord. I would venture to say that more people are having health related issues (high blood pressure, headaches, hypertension, poor eating, weight loss, etc..) from their financial portfolio and/or worry about their personal economic condition. Not knowing how your bills will be paid certainly can certainly affect your outlook on life.

In these lean economic times, relationship counselors are seeing their business dwindle. The solution? Why not sponsor and encourage a bill that will increase business for themselves?

Your friend's support and/or sponsorship of this bill is nothing more than a way to increase clients.

Oh...and the discount on the license fee? Florida charges $82.50 for a marriage license. The $32.50 for residents is negligable.

Again - you need to tell the ENTIRE story.

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